Heads and Wings - bodies not included

I am in legislative limbo. I am in procedural purgatory.

My boss has a bill. A very nice, non-controversial bill… very apple pie and baseball and all that is right with America (and not putting “in God we trust on the SIDE of the one dollar coin either) bill.

We were supposed to have our day of glory last Tuesday. I waited on the Floor of the House for FIVE, count them, FIVE hours. Because of Republican malfeasance we never got to my bill and everything was postponed for a week…

So THIS Tuesday I went to the floor again with my boss. He gave his speech, we were all set for a voice vote (all 7 Members of Congress who were actually ON the floor at the time) and then the Republican nonsense flared up again. They objected on the fact that a quorum wasn’t present. Which actually was true, because there were only 7 MOC’s on the floor. But there generally aren’t all that many folks hanging out on the floor at any given time. But anyway, it generally isn't a problem, and those on the floor say 'yes' and it's all good. The objection didn't have anything to do with my bill. The R's are unhappy about the Supplemental, blah, blah blah. (A conversation for another time.) ANYWAY, so some silly MOC from IDAHO objected sending my bill into legislative limbo. WTF?!

At the end of the day, I was under the impression that we didn’t need a vote, that perhaps the MOC from ID had withdrawn his objection. This clearly wasn’t the case (not even sure you can do that) and I came to work this morning only to discover that my bill was again on the suspension calendar.

So I waited all day in anticipation for the vote to happen. I had my meetings. I met with my port officials and my Egyptian ministers and my Army peeps. And then the vote list came out and I wasn’t on it. UG!!!

So I have to go another day into the bleak nothingness that is the floor of the House of Representatives. Late tonight I got Thursday’s vote list. My apple pie, baseball, I love America bill is again on the list. But, I swear if they don’t vote on my bill tomorrow I’m going to jump off my 7th floor ledge into the middle of the Rayburn horseshoe plaza.